Greatest Hits [Always Remember]

Back in the beginning days of the Century

Club, when it was simply myself- Ryan, Bri, and maybe a ouple other folks who have faded off into non existence, but it was a special day when the Australian Dan came along... not because he turned out to be awesome in his own way, but because inside his tangled web of baggage would he drag his very American girlfriend Sarah.

Much time would pass before Sarah and I would become as close as we are now, but I have to at least recognize that's where it started. We would go on to have many ridiculous adventures and delusions of grandeur. Ha ha. (read that laugh out loud) Now we are BFFF (that extra F is colloquial French) Now, my dear friend is leaving the States, and heading to the outback in the pursuit of love, and that next story to tell in this thing called, life... and I find myself sitting here reflecting on some of our best moments... our 'greatest hits' so to speak.

"Skullfucking"

Every one knows I speak a peculiar language- Tescaderian if you will, (it's mostly cuss words, military jargon and lazy slang) and nobody has reacted to it as vibrant as Sarah has.

"The Beat It Routines"

It was a WHOLE YEAR before Michael Jackson died, but Sarah and I who are horrible dancers alone, decided to team up and attempt to recreate the "Beat It" knife fight scene. It didn't work out so well.

Part 1:

Part 2:

"The Fish Fry Encore"

Sarah's from the south... so she loves to fry fish. Supposedly, at one point fish was the only meat she'd eat. Something about being a Presbyterian or Peterman or something... who knows. So Dan, invites us over to fry up some fish on his porch, because that's the silly things we do. We had an awesome time, and somehow we got drunk- and headed out. At one point, I went into the bathroom to freestyle about Sarah's North Carolina upbringing, and how she was raised near the Krispy Kreme factory. (Supposedly, there's video of this.) (ok, ok...it's on Facebook.) I know, right? Weird.

"Walking on Broken Glass"

Sarah, Ashley and I go to some club on U St. just hours after I went to my friend's wedding. Of course we were over served, I tried to hook

Sarah up with a bartender who wore a shirt reading, "I want to kick your puppy" and according to her, I was hitting on some ugly chick. Then we drove 2 miles out of the way to get Harsh, and then an additional 10 miles in the middle of the night to go get pancakes from iHop...all while Sarah had a piece of glass in her foot from dancing in the club. (She found that out the next day.)

"The Wedding"

Harsh and I went and got shit faced one night, and ended up in the newspaper two days later. As you can see, I was shit faced enough to answer the question, "What would you do in a financial

crunch, and why?" With the answer, "Take all my money out of the bank, put it in my Spider-Man lunchbox, and hide it in my garage." I didn't think the girl asking me was serious. Sure enough, three days later- there I was... in the paper. Looking like a damn fool. Sarah with the rest of the city saw this posting and asked me later on about this Spider-Man lunchbox and whether or not it was real. She didn't believe it. Well, dammit. It was very real. I brought it to her Thanksgiving dinner, and she was SO in love with the damn thing she decided to marry it. Yes, ceremony and all. It was a beautiful event, complete with an audience. We also created a Facebook page for him. (Friend him NOW. His name is 'Jack Lunchebocks') Sadly, they would later divorce because I got tired of brown bagging to work.

The Marriage:

Finally, "The Rasslin' Promo"

That same day, at the Fish Fry Part deux, Sarah and I somehow started talking about wrestling in the 80's and how they had silly promos for upcoming events... well it wasn't long before we decided to make our own, calling out other members of the Century Club as 'Sarah Granite' and 'The Awesomest Warrior' ...yes that those are paper towels wrapped around her head.

Well, I could go on for days...but I'll end here before it just gets creepy. I'll miss my buddy and I hope this move gets her one step closer to figuring it all out.

Century Club forever, bitches Cobrai Kai recognize!! Love ya, Tony.

"Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think." -(Christopher Robin to Pooh) 'The House at Pooh Corner'; A.A. Milne